Hm

I've been skipping the blog! I am too lazy, or as people say, busy, to get on and update! Well, yeah. These past few weeks, I've been taking my mind off of men, drama, focus, just everything. I know that makes me sound so irresponsible, but it made me realize how capable I am of doing everything I am handling every single day. I lack love, I am full of selfishness. But honestly, I just feel like, I'm getting closer and closer to the Bible every day. So cheesy, but true. I cannot trust anyone around here. Pretty much a secret.. I always thought best friends were there for a reason, but truthfully, you can't trust nobody. Hehehehe. Christmas here I come! I'm not even ready but listening to the holiday music puts me into a goooood mood (: I miss the old days, where I was around my old friends. I miss PARKS kids! Ugh screw Troy. I want Sunny Hills :( And I'm really trying these days, although I'm still a badass ;) Well. I'm sleeping. I'm running about.. three or four miles tomorrow with Gabrielle <3. And then workout! It sounds harsh, but dance has pretty much covered it all. Yay. Byeee

Well

I've been avoiding using the computers this week, because I had so many things to get done. Thanksgiving was fun, not too fun, but content-ing. Black Friday was exciting. At 2AM my mom came home so I got ready because I did not sleep at all and I was texting Gabby all night, then we all met up at Old Navy. Johnny, Gabby, her Mom, my Mom, and I went to Old Navy in Birch. Exciting! Then we got out at like 4:30 ish, and the thing is, I was suposed to go to Irvine at 5:30 with Gabby! But I overslept and then ended going to Brea Mall and splurging haha. I met Yeon, Sung, Lauren&JamesByunteh, Jinny & Stella, and my favorite, Ellen (: And Justing Chang claimed that he saw me in Hollister while I was buying my clothes haha. Well, yeah. I miss Sunny kids! :( I imagine my care-free life I can have if I went to SunnyHills, especially because of my high possibilities in getting a scholarship for dance. Well yeah, then yesterday, on Saturday, I went to Gabby's and we went to ToysRUs, Pandaexpress, BCF, Marshalls, and got clothes, then we went to Albertsons, then watched horror stuff then went bowling. Hahaha, then I went home around 12 and then yeah. Here are some pictures.

Motivation

I am currently reading Romans in the Holy Book, because I was inspired to live a healthier life by applying the gospel into my daily life. Although I was broken because of the difficulties I've been facing for awhile now at church and other places, I was able to rethink and realize that this is the signal God's giving me to try harder and not let materialistic things get in my way. He's been wanting me to be able to find him instead of running to other people and forgetting about how important He was. Even if I lose all my friends, God's all I've got. I know it's so hard to believe that I was convinced by the community group's lessons, but I know I haven't been putting enough effort. I've honestly thought that looking better than "that girl" was putting me forward, now that I've looked at it, I've made myself lower than I already was by trying hard to impress people I don't really even care about. I know I can't immediately fix my problems, but I'm starting to try more. I want to move churches. I'm so sick and tired of GFC. I don't know :/ Well, yeah. Idols are the main distraction to my life, but I'm going to remind myself from this day forward that materialistic things aren't the main points in life. I'm the worst person ever -.- Well, I'm freakishly tired, and I don't even know why I'm like not even sleeping.

Today

Is so depressing. I have no idea why. I'm so exhausted. I miss you. I miss everything, but it's hard for me to continue wanting it. I freaking failed the french crap today, and Timmmmy pulled a bad joke on me today in art. Well, I don't feel good. Someone help me.

Texting Donna and Gabby

And telling Gabby how inspirational GLEE is. I love that show! I first thought it was lame, but trust, this is a goooooooood show. My head hurts and I feel like throwing up :/ Ugh. Well, yeah, I am currently in my room on my computer and I'm really tired but I need to finish my English hw on TKAM and study for my final third day of french2 exam. I don't even get French. I need a tutor or something. I give up on you! Donna is making me satisfied with this horrendous day. Today was excruciating. I hated today. I just had the worst day today, and the fact I had three exams -.- And I have exams this whole week! Darn it. I'm actually trying to make a difference (: Don't you seeee it?! Well yeah. I need to kick it with meeeeee faaavoriteee Donnnna <3 Hhahaha, well yeah. I'm done wasting my time to entertain you readers hahahaha. Current obsession: freaking Wooyoung from 2PM. Just stating that makes me ten times lame-er than usual but ever since they even came out, I've laid my eyes on that boy! hahaha, besides the secret one I like ;) Well, I am like, totally tired haha, and my fingers keep typing but I'm truly done now. hahaha, je fini. ... hahhaha i'm pretty sure that's wrong. man, efff francais! hahhaa, jplayyy. J'adore.

Do you get that feeling

Of letting things go, but you truly want it back? Well, I do. But nothing's going to change. No one's really trying. Haha, well. I am currently using Lauren's laptop ;) Dance is truly boring, well it makes up my life. And then I have to study study study. I honestly liked my old life better, with my long hair -.- Ever since the hair's been cut, my life has turned 180 degrees. I've lost everything, but I've lost the guts to bring it back like before. I want you, and I want it back, but idk if I'm able to. Well, bye <3 update laaaterrrr! hahaha, Tim and I put matching heart rhinestone stickers on our phones LOL haha. He looks gay with his phone, but I know deep inside he adores it. Talk to me through my phone babbbyss. Bye.

I don't

Want you anymore. Today was so boring! It was incredibly impossible to say you had a more dull day than me. I need someone to rely on! Jeez, and I need to study and yeah. haha, dance is hurting me more than ever and yeah. I am feeling like I need to throw up. I feel so sick all of the sudden. Gut feeling tells me to get him back, but my mind is set to letting it go. Well! I'm going to choreograph rest of the song and yeah (: Feeeel free to text/call/aim. Bye!

what the hell?!

So someone went on my blog and typed some random crap lol. Well, currently doing hw, talking to Michael Choe, hm, yeah. I'm done with crying over him, I'm done missing all the things that I shouldn't have been missing. I'm done with everything ;) Well, I'm planning on what to do tomorrow because Gabby's obviously stupid, haha, jkays, I love you bfffff! Anyways, I am feeling lurked. Like someone I dont' know is reading my blog entries haha. Weeeeelll, I am done! Time for my painkillers. My leg sucks -.- Well byeee <3


" I'm the broken-hearted girl that wants everything out of him " apparently, He says he didn't want me, he said he wanted someone else, the girl of his dreams. She didn't want him. What will he do now? He said she said blah. Even if I wanted you back, you're done. That leaves me with.. uh, a new choice. You choose (:

I

Secretly like you. But you just don't know. We're long forgotten.
I'm tired of waiting. So maybe I'll just let it go.

Homecoming!

Okay, I guess it was alright. Just a few stressful moments, and it was fine. So, I met up with Lawrence and his two friends... Uhh.. I already forgot their names. David and Harrison! Or something haha. And then, we ate at Guppy's then went to Troy. I saw Jenny Yun! She's like, the same haha. Well, yeah. Then Lawrence decides to disappear with a chick with my shit -.- Ugh, whatever. Anyways, piiiictuuures!

Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!

I'm really trying now. I've never felt more motivated in my life than this. Tomorrow's homecoming, and apparently, I'm not ready. My arm really aches. I don't know what's going on with my body. I'm always injuring myself and the simplicity of healing early is like zero percent. I tore my muscle/ligament. I can't bend my leg. Tragic. Well, come back to meeee ;) Haha! Anyways, I am determined for a new start (: My hair's growing! Yay! Well, yeah. Even though I'm one of the most negative person, I'm trying to renew myself into a more positive attitude. I'm becoming more satisfied, but I'm not there yet. Yeah (: Byeeeee

It's November

Autumn. I'm pressured to keep being "innocent" for the rest of my life, but recently, I've wanted to just get out of the box and do whatever I want. I'm trying my hardest to keep up my grades and keep my social activities. Ugh, and I think I did something really bad to my knee. I have to wear knee braces and I got crutches, sadly. But I don't have to be on crutches at all times unless I need my support. Haha, I look crippled. Well, yeah. It's really late. I usually sleep at nine thirty. Surprisingly, I had makeup hw and I needed to study so yeah. I'm just sitting on my desk. Studying and typing this. Was at Gabby's until like, eleven. Man -.- Well, going to go (:


byeee <3


I wonder if I'll ever see him again.

Halloween today!

Ugh, I don't know whether I should go to the yacht party, gabby's, or church to help out. Hm, yeah. Well, I need to get ready because I'm going to go shopping for stuff (: homecoming heeels, and some more stuff I need for other stuff. Haha, well, yeah. toooodles.

Finally an internet connection!

It's Thursday, and Lawrence finally asks me. FINALLY. Jeez that asshole was like "I'm buying the ticket before I ask you" -.- This was all planned haha. It was cute. Little dolls in my classes. It got me thinking who it would be. NOTTT! (: Anyways, yeah. Oh! Hope he's not reading this... LOL on Wednesday, I went to Sam Koo's house for community groups. I think I embarrassed myself like... ten times. Well the most embarrassing thing was... I was like, I guess trespassing into his room because I really thought he was on the computer. I promise! And then I went into his room because I haven't been there since like, wow, a while back, then I started reading the card I made him and then LOLLLL he was standing in the doorway staring weirdly at me. GOD so embarrassing! jeeez bad luck these days! Hahah, well, I have to do well in school, and like yeah. I'm still doing hw. I can't believe I'm getting sidetracked. Probably cause the computer is now in my room. hahaha! Well, yeah. I am so tired. Bleehh. wellllll, tooodles! <3


I still miss him.


....................... haha.

@ Gabby's.

I'm cracking up with Gabby. I'm no hater.

but I've also realized.

I couldn't let go of you.





moving.



UGH man suck my tits.

I've realized alot more

about you. well, guess what everyone, we don't fucking live up to everyone else's needs and satisfactions.


FUCK YOU! that just tells me how fucking FAKE you are. One year? Two years? Six years? fuck that! shit, bitches need to giiittt theiiirrr shit straighht. anyways, alot of people drifted away from me this year, and yeah, i've learned my lesson: not to make friends with useless assholes that aren't worth my time. KEEP YOUR SHIT REAL. And esp, don't make friends with fucking PLAYERS. Yeah, I'm fucking talking to you. JEEEZ asshole. Yes. That's my lesson, BAM righhhht therrrre. Anyways, (: Today was an okay day. During the first ten minutes of first period, when I had to perform ballet to teach the class, I freaking popped my knee out of place. OMFG, it was HELLLLLL. weeeellllllll, i popped it back in place and freaked my teacher and class out hahaha.
welll, going to sam's. -.- byeeeeee!


is it possible to bring a long friendship back? or do i just have to deal with an asshole?

Okay

So currently, Edison's Aunt, Sally? Hahah, she's over at my house. I was out at dinner with the Cha family and some other family. She said she's heard "ALOT" about me. hahaa, how cute (: Anyways, yeah. Today is not any better, but today I REALLY DON'T CARE ABOUT YOU.

weeeelll, i'm going off cause they're talking about my typing skills lol hahaha, omfg weeeeird lol, weeeell udpate later (: toooodles <3

Universal Studios Halloween Horror Nights

So we got in with our preordered tickets, and the first friends we faced was Saw's pighead chainsaw monsters with curly long brunette hair. Then we walked in a little more then we saw the stilt monsters and everything. It was fun looking at different monsters. Then we went to the Simpson's Ride. It was fun, the first time riding on it. Last time I went, I couldnt' get on it because there were way too many people. Then we went on the Tour Tram, and they just dropped us off at the sets of horror movies and The War of the Worlds set. We had to walk and there were monsters everywhere scaring the crap out of everyone. They're definitely not friendly though. Because I asked a monster if I can touch is eyeball that's hanging out and he didn't respond. Asshole. Hahaha, then we went on The Strangers set and it was freaky because the people with the bags over their head was there trying to cut us up. Haha, then we went back to the themepark. Then we watched a show, then went downstairs for The Mummy ride. It was fun hahah. Then the pigs were there again and everything. Then we went to the Saw maze. God, it was disgusting! And it also smelled like crap! It smelled like dead human bodies... not that I know. But yeah (: Then we went everywhere else, even the pornographic show and everything, then yeah. We went back home and I got home at like 1:50 ish and then told my mom stuff that happened there and then yeah. I slept... hahah.
and today hahaha, Gabby was talking about the Korean BBQ, GALBI, and she was like "OH THATS WHY I LOVE IT BECAUSE IT KINDA MATCHES WITH MY NAME!" LOL and yesterdays, "I think I need to wear a dark colored thong just incase I shit my pants at universal" HAHAHAHA anyways, i luhh herr!

ugh

fucking crrrrying.
I hatee this. I want to go somewhere far away.
So no one can find me. I don't even know why this has to happen. And I'm just, like ughhh.

Life is

awfully complicated. Complacent people, lying about their lives, innocent people cajoled by assholes out there, giving up on their opportunities. Broken promises, falsehood, etc. People need to step up to their game and act their own age. Period.

universal horror nights tomorrrow! (:

French Class!